I’ve been trying to avoid the inevitable, trying to delay what is supposed to be. I faced it, alas! It carved a mark in my heart and soul. And now I’m so lost and confused. I’m trying my best to be a better person... to be a loving wife, a doting mother, a responsible daughter, a reliable sister, an objective friend, a hardworking employee, a just member of the society. Does one really have to carry the task and burden of such? I’m asking for more patience, guidance and counsel, of love and understanding, of hope that eventually things will get better. Enough of the leaping out of faith, I’ll retire myself for what is to come. Who knows if I can get back the urge to fight back again and conquer the odds, but for now, I’m just tired. I’ve been hiding and fighting too much, and I’m missing a lot.