towards december, i was finding the courage and strength to write. but words just fail me. i can't even make a cohesive thought, everything is jumbled up and there were so many missing pieces in my heart and mind. they would just not connect at all.
i wanted to write about my feelings, but i'm too afraid for it to be too much. i'm afraid that too many questions would be said, and no answers would suffice. and then it would hurt. my patience is being tested, and i'm trying to breathe. i'm at lost for emotions, because i don't know exactly how to feel and react. i guess it's my fault... all along, i had high hopes which i wasn't even sure. and now, it's all gone... pieces of me are shaved off and putting them back all together is a mess.
Monday, December 22, 2008
Monday, December 08, 2008
rainbows and sunshine
It’s fascinating to watch the sunrise coming in through the windows and catching the warm sunshine in your face. It’s like admiring a rainbow shine at its best after the rain and realizing how great life is. I would like to think about wonderful miracles these days. Especially when you’re expecting something wonderful to happen, a miracle perhaps.
When you find yourself in a situation that you cannot control, that is out of hand, all you can do is cry, pick up the pieces of your broken heart and move on. Don’t feel sad or defeated, because you’ve done your best and it’s the utmost of your capabilities. So don’t blame yourself… sometimes, things just doesn’t turn out the way we hope it should be. And I know it must really hurt big time, but we are all interconnected. And whatever the other person decides, will affect us further on in a different manner that we can’t explain at the moment. It will reveal itself maybe tomorrow, next month, next year… who knows. Some day you will just realize the purpose of that unwanted incident in your life and nod your head and say to yourself, “ahh now I get it.” But ‘til then, just remember the rainbows and sunshine. They might not be there at all times, but it happens. And so will your miracle and mine.
When you find yourself in a situation that you cannot control, that is out of hand, all you can do is cry, pick up the pieces of your broken heart and move on. Don’t feel sad or defeated, because you’ve done your best and it’s the utmost of your capabilities. So don’t blame yourself… sometimes, things just doesn’t turn out the way we hope it should be. And I know it must really hurt big time, but we are all interconnected. And whatever the other person decides, will affect us further on in a different manner that we can’t explain at the moment. It will reveal itself maybe tomorrow, next month, next year… who knows. Some day you will just realize the purpose of that unwanted incident in your life and nod your head and say to yourself, “ahh now I get it.” But ‘til then, just remember the rainbows and sunshine. They might not be there at all times, but it happens. And so will your miracle and mine.
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